As a first time mom, I find myself always getting advice from other moms, whether I want it or not.
I am not complaining, because any advice is helpful. However, I do not agree with mom shaming. I have not had a lot of “mom fail” moments yet. Despite baby girl being in daycare from six weeks of life, somehow I get to see her do a lot of things first, which is wonderful because in Early Childhood we always joke about seeing babies do everything first. And even if she does things first there, they don’t tell me because they know it would break my heart and I love them for that.
My biggest “mom fail” moment is not one that can be pinpointed exactly. I am a super protective mom. And recently we had a brief hospital stay due to winter germs rearing their ugly little heads. I was super emotional and spent almost a whole week home with baby girl, which we had not done since Christmas. I noticed that ever since then, she has been more clingy to me. She has finally entered the dreaded “stranger danger” stage we thought she might miss because she was around new people in school. Now, of course, after studying Early Childhood and being a Montessorian, I know that it is just a part of development. But it breaks my heart.
My daughter has not done it with her teachers yet, but she did do it recently with her aunt and her grandfather. It absolutely crushed me to see them sad when my daughter burst out in tears when they picked her up. Our family has been spending a lot of time just the three of us lately, so that does not help. Again, I know it is just part of the age, but I hope she starts to feel comfortable again soon.
I think working in the field of Education makes you have more of a microscope on you as a mom. I always hear “well you are a teacher…” so you should not be surprised by anything. That is completely one hundred percent false.
Until it happens to you, you think you are prepared, but that could not be further from the truth. I have a reputation for being the perfectionist mom and my baby girl likes to challenge that. I put her on a schedule from day one because I know how hard it is for daycare to do if parents do not help. Then I hear she will not sleep or do this or that and I feel like…maybe I have it all wrong.
I have to remind myself that there is no such thing as a perfect parent. If there is a perfect parent out there, I would like to shake their hand and get all the advice from them.
The closer my daughter gets to turning one, and the more I get the hang of this mom life, I am realizing that I am not a perfect mom, and I am okay with that.
I am the mom that gets called “high maintenance” and I am okay with that, because it means I am on top of things. I am the mom who is sensitive, and when her baby is sad, she is sad. I am the mom who the Pediatrician’s office knows because I call often. I am the mom who does not get to go to activities one on one with her baby, because she is a teacher and her baby spends eight hours a day in daycare. I am the mom who is doing a Target run at 8pm the night before Valentine’s Day and on Pinterest at the last minute because I forgot the Valentines for her class. I am the mom who tries to balance it all, but sometimes I forget a thing or too. I am the mom who would rather stay home with my kid that go out. I am the mom who has not left her kid (other than school) yet. I have accepted all of this… and I am okay with it.