{Practical} Self Care for When You’re Tired as a Mother

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If you have infants, toddlers, or even teens underfoot, you may not feel inclined to do more than press the snooze button and pull the sheets over your head. Been there.

I spend much of my day figuratively “in the trenches” with Mothers, and I’ve come to realize we’ve so overused the term “self care” to the point that ANY mention of it elicits eye rolls that would make Tina Fey proud. That doesn’t change the reality that we are not fit to care for others if we are not caring for ourselves, so let’s discuss a few practical {FREE} tips that you can incorporate as you feel appropriate. Scroll for the bold highlights if you’re hiding in the bathroom to gather your sanity.

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Feel, Authentically.
Advice doesn’t become cliche without an element of truth. I won’t judge you if you literally turn to Google to look up “funny memes” or search #petty or #meme on Insta… laughter is good for the soul. Even the dark humored kind. Brighten someone’s day and share a guilt free moment of joy through a phone call or text. If you actually need to shed a few tears, make that same phone call to a trusted friend and share each other’s burdens. Not quite ready for that? Watch “This is Us,” problem solved.

#KonMarie that To-Do List!
Do you really need to bring home the class’ pet turtle for Spring Break? “No” is a complete sentence. Say it with me, “No.” N-O. You can even say, “No, thank you” if you feel like you’d still rather not upset your Mama. Buy boxed cake mix and let the kids decorate their own birthday cupcakes. Choose a staycation over the lavish vacation-that-will-take-all-year-to-pay-off. People, especially children, are not scrolling Pinterest to quality control your efforts. If they are, they are most certainly not your people.

Speak Up For Yourself.
Boundaries are a woman’s best friend. In a world with a voracious appetite for oversharing, we are often faced with intrusive people demanding to know all of the things that are none of their business. Channel election season. “Can’t discuss that, I might run for office someday,” is completely acceptable. “No” is still a complete sentence, but weaving in a little humor may keep them quiet a few moments longer.

Treat Yourself Like an Animal.
Whaaat??!? Yes, and I absolutely mean it. Imagine you are a neglected shelter-bound mammal who has just been adopted. Surely, you would begin this relationship by providing a safe place, nourishing food, a soft blanket, loving body language, and soft caresses to this new animal, no? The next time you look in the mirror, don’t kid yourself into believing that you are not worthy of that same kindness and compassion. I would love to take full credit for this idea, but the day I read it in an interview with Elizabeth Gilbert, author of “Eat, Pray, Love” and “Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear,” my world clicked. I wish the same for you, friend.

Self care isn’t pedicures and bath bombs, though if your cup is full and that’s what brings you joy… by all means, indulge. We have to know we are worthy. Admissions in the face of retribution, believing deep in your bones that you are capable of amazing feats, radical acceptance of yourself and others, and leading your children by example aren’t easy to do from a well that’s been run dry for others. It starts in your mirror, and what a gorgeous reflection is waiting.