Some days, I’m on fire. Balance finds me.
The day begins around 6am. It’s not super early, but may as well be to this non morning person who happens to, unfortunately, despise coffee. During the school year, I wake my 7 year old twins for school. We usually fail at our attempts to NOT wake the “full of life at all times” 3 year old.
One of the twins will pop out of bed, talking a mile a minute, just like his daddy. The other, a miniature version of her momma, will not be real thrilled when the sun peeps through the blinds, but will still be able to quietly be grateful for the new day.
Some days, our personalities clash but most days, we all balance each other out. Clothes are laid out the night before so they are dressed, their hair and teeth are brushed by 6:45am, and everyone is headed to school in Daddy’s truck, just in time for breakfast.
After drop off, my husband heads to our family business, located 30 miles away, and I attempt to fit chores into the few hours I have before heading there too. We work until it’s time to drive the 30 miles back to pick them up from school. Then it’s more chores, grocery shopping, feeding chickens, dogs, cats and turtles.
Sleep. Wake. Repeat.
However, some days, the balance eludes me, and I’m seconds away from joining my children in a meltdown. So, I decided a short list of things I try to remember in the never ending sometimes impossible quest for balance in hopes that it helps you too.
You are not alone, my dear.
1. Adaption\Bending Without Breaking.
It’s taken me years to mostly understand that its perfectly okay to have an off day. Some days, we may be late because the alarm didn’t go off or because my daughter doesn’t like the way her socks feel in her shoes. While it’s important to have a routine, it’s necessary to adapt, to allow bending room. I noticed when I put so much pressure on myself to have a “perfect” day, I rarely achieved that nor did I go to bed feeling accomplished.
2. Don’t forget to take care of yourself.
When my youngest son was in the NICU, it was so easy to lose myself and forget to eat. A nurse finally reminded me that because I was pumping for him, he depended on me and the nutrients, or lack of, that I was providing through my milk. It’s crucial to take care of yourself so that you can properly care for your littles. And your bigs.
3. Let your spouse/family help.
Yes, you are supermom! But even she needs a break.
Let your partner or family (when they offer) put the kids to bed, or prepare dinner. Let the kids have sleepovers with trusted family or friends every so often. This ties back in to adapting – allow the change and take a breather. You’ll be a better parent and a better you!
4. Don’t forget friendships, but don’t over-commit.
When you become a parent, friendships often change. Do your part in keeping in touch with your new and old pals but be honest when you aren’t up for a social call. “Sally Sue is sick” can only be used so many times, unless of course it’s true. Plan or take part in playdates, and occasionally, adult only playdates, which are necessary for everyone.